Wednesday, December 03, 2003

Dream Theater: Scourge of Humanity?

Or, at least, to my friggin' ears.

So, I've had veiled threats on my job. Not just me, but the entire staff. "Pick up the numbers... or else." By "numbers," they don't mean revenue. That's been spectacular. No, they're talking about the bullchit "Strategic Initiatives" that "drive sales" (i.e., Entertainment Weekly subscriptions). Ladies and germs, whenever there are that many quotation marks in a paragraph, the corporate boys and girls (mostly boys) have had the expensive surgery to transplant their brains into their ass.

Not surprisingly, all the steps of the hierarchy are leaning heavily on the one below them. Trickle... all... the way... down. Yesterday, il Duce takes control to demonstrate how to get our numbers up... and runs into the South Hills Village crowd. In other words, despite his definite retail skills, 4 hours resulted in a number of 0's. By this time, he's a cursing ball of frustration. Welcome to our world, Mr. Manager.

He then goes in back to train new hires, and puts on Dream Theater.

Bastard.

If you've never heard the excrement that is DT, imagine Megadeth without ANY talent, skill, or creativity. Now, I enjoy the occasional rocking out, but this was just terrible. AND it was being played in-store. AND, of course, irate customers were looking at me like I was a plague... because, obviously, the guy in all black, wearing rings/chain, with the goatee... HE (me) picked the muzac.

Grrrrr...

Meanwhile, my roommate (the illimitable Tony) was being audited by his company, on his day off. Well, his store was. It will probably be a less-than-good grade, which is utter bullchit. You see, Tony runs a tight ship, and holds his employees to exacting standards.

All this bitching and rambling has a point, surprisingly. Well, probably not to you. It's to justify the massive purchase of alcohol Tony and I made last night. I had my friend Drambuie, his brother Jack, and his other brother Jack. (But stay away from that Melon liquoeuar. That shit's nasty.)

Oh, and by the way... playing Warhammer 40,000: Fire Warrior while drunk is a true experience. not necessarily good, but definitely "true." Whatever that means. After all, it does have quotation marks around it...

-J.

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